YOU'RE NOT MY REAL FATHER!!!!

Let me tell you about the first film to ever put me to sleep.

I was about 13 years old and I was looking for a movie at my local video store. The Stepfather caught my eye, recently acquiring a step parent my self, I thought this should be fun.

It wasn't. I got like half way through when I just passed out. Right out. Like a light. Stone cold sleep.

Fast forward to 2009. Hollywood, being the wealth of creativity that it is, decided to remake The Stepfather. So being hopeful that maybe, just maybe, they could make it a bit better I decided to give it a try.

I was wrong.

The Stepfather starts off introducing you to David Harris (Dylan Walsh). In the opening scene you see the aftermath of his killing spree. You immediately know who he is and what he is about. But then again you knew this from the trailer. David moves to a new town and starts looking for another family. He meets Susan Harding (Sela Ward) in a grocery store with her two younger children. He weasels his way into the family and all is right in his psychopathic brain. Until Susan's oldest son, Michael (Penn Badgley), comes home from military school. He becomes suspicious of his soon to be stepfather and questions arise about David's past.

This is pretty much the story. Every time people get curious of David's past, they die. A neighbor, the ex-husband, Susan's random lesbian friend (or she may have been her sister), all dead. And not in creative ways. All of them by some form of asphyxiation.

BORING.

You can pretty much describe the entire movie as boring. I was hoping the family would have been killed. Then there was Michael's blond, vapid girlfriend who was basically always in her bathing suit or undies. I guess they had to throw something in there so the guys would stay interested.

It didn't work for me and I like boobs.

I fell asleep. I really did. I fell asleep. I guess it was just like the original after all.

RATINGS:

ACTING:

GORE:---

HUMOR:---

OVERALL: 1/2 of a skull.